The Official How To Blog

Summer is nearly here and with that the arrival of banana-thong season:

bananathongAccording to every magazine, you are fat and you only need to follow “these 8 simple steps” to lose weight. According to every magazine, the ideal woman-shape is this:

idealwoman

According to every magazine, the ideal man shape is this:

idealmanshapeHow do you get to your ideal shape? Simple! By following “these 8 simple steps:”

1. Don’t eat food. If you start to feel light-headed, stuff yourself with packing peanuts. They’re only 7 calories a ton!

2. Exercise a lot. The optimal exercise program would combine using an Ab Roller®,  a Shakeweight® and a ThighMaster® simultaneously.

3. Move to the moon. You will automatically weigh less because of the weaker gravitational pull. That’s science, my friend. Only don’t eat the moon because it’s made of cheese and cheese is fattening–even on the moon.

4. Drink Slim-Fast® shakes to…

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